work and family

just a curious thought: if we all saw work as work and life outside of work as such (specifically family)- suitably dividing time between both - with family being more important, what would happen?

should you wait to have your own family before committing to that family? or commit to the one you came from until you leave it?

In my ideal world, everyone has someone they love looking after them. they don't go into nursing homes and they don't become abandoned. it's nice to have the advances of technology, growth in education, new toys to play with and new ways to see the world. How important are those things when the people you care about are left to fend for themselves among others who have been left ...because of different ideas of success?

In a family you could have a small functioning unit of people who have enough time to care for each other i.e. one person is looking after 10 extremely sick people which is near impossible to do well.

hello papa

anti-depressants when you're on other mind-altering drugs (most, if not all pharmaceuticals) is not a bad idea. so either my dad is more awake because we've been adding a pill of celexa to his regular dose of anti-seizure or because we stopped giving him anti-anxiety drug (which was not supposed to happen), i don't know, but he's been a lot more alert. He smiled today - doubt because i actually said anything funny - but he smiled and everything for that second was brilliant.

yesterday, he also grabbed my wrist and held on tight while i got to be his baby girl and laid my head on his chest. i tried so hard to remember those moments where he patted me to sleep or held me next him because i was his child. I couldn't, but knowing that it had happened was good enough.

God - your everyday will be done.

serenity and such

i'm really bad at peace, "letting go to divine providence" (thank you dkn)
i am bad at trusting god and letting that still my heart which leads me to feeling unqualified as a christian (so to speak) and that causes more anxiety. It's like a vicious cycle and i'd like to use the term here though i don't think it applies, it's seductive destruction (keller's terms).

anyway, a couple things i want to work on - diligence and inner peace with god. Jesus - show me the way?

love,

hang

poem for you

In pitch black, I stood
perhaps in fear
or a fog of uncertainty
till i realize
we were a part of a body
with piercing broad vast wings
we came from darkness
into light. we were the light.
From page one of normality
to a story deeper than prodigal son.
It must have been the tales of poo
Ask Rach and Brooke
or in between games of taboo
and birthday cupcakes too.
This is, community.
And I can't wait
there's more to come.

happy birthday rachel, Monday - May 3rd