understanding
realizing that you've searched
but all in the wrong places
"who do you think I am?"
pushing and pushing
draining all possible confessions of love
faithfulness
never leaving
Yet no man can provide
fulfilled promises only within the grace of god
fountain of living water
from within
no man has
no man will
no man can
In Him may I lay my burdens
willing to see the answers before me
realization
appreciation
I AM and therefore
I am.
Awaken to the power within.
Growing up receiving the constant praises of others, held up as some standard of being and wrecked my brokenness that can be family, tainted by an affair or perhaps multiple, destroyed by the constant search for self not from the holy spirit who feeds your soul but from the world that is chaotic and itself lost, I woke up this morning, heart pounding, conflict laden, soul heavy and yelling at the top of my spirit, "Who do you think I am?" As if I've always been searching for that answer from the world, to say, you are good, you are worth fighting for. And through that, manifested in beautiful and disastrous relationships, from the constant searching and prodding and hoping, rather than allowing god to work and laying at His feet, rather than filling my cup with living water, I was showing my empty cup demanding it be filled.
