oh to love freely

I used to love a lot! At least, it was easy to say the words, I love you, to call a friend dear, sweet heart. In middle/high school, it wasn't a problem to love so much - at least I was better blinded - and then for some time, I realized I couldn't say I love you to a friend...I was too afraid that it would mean too much to them and not as much to me or that in saying I love you, I couldn't stand behind the weight and responsibility of that love to lift someone up or to call regularly...because people said they loved me and did that. Now, in a moment of bliss of just completing a big exam (regardless of success levels)...I freely threw out those words to friends/friends who know very little about me and I know very little about them (because I've spent the last month studying, because I never really asked the questions and they never really asked about me...because we were all studying, all the time). Is it better this way? Better to say I love you then to be scared, better to just love anyway and worry about the consequences/responsibilities later? How can I do both? Sorry not a very good posts, but eh...I'm writing this for me.